I often remind people that true love is based on respect. If someone feels an emotion and doesn't know if it's love, then the litmus test is whether it is based on respect.
Many times women in abuse think they feel love for the abuser, but it's
really another emotion masquerading as love simply because they have no other basis for comparison and they will accept any substitute that appears to work. These counterfeit emotions include codependency, need, physical
attraction, and familiarity.
I found the following helpful checklist on:
YOUR RIGHTS IN A RELATIONSHIP:
If you are in a relationship, you must be treated with respect, which means
is willing to compromise.
lets you feel comfortable being yourself.
is able to admit when he is wrong.
tries to resolve conflict with honest discussion.
enables you to feel safe when you're with him.
respects your feelings, opinions and friends.
accepts when you say NO.
accepts you changing your mind.
respects your wishes if you want to end the relationship.
When someone loves you, you feel valued, respected and free to be yourself. You should not be made to feel intimidated or controlled.